Sunday, June 6, 2010

Kindergarten orientation meltdown

So we went to kindergarten orientation this past Thursday and the first thing they asked the kids to do was find there name tags. Well at the other school he was going to I was paying for it and DHS told me he would be adopted before kindergarten so I told the school to have him practice writing our last name not his old last name as to not upset him. Well since kindergarten is at a public school they have to as they told me play by the rules and if that is his legal name they have to use it. I tried explaining the situation but you know how that goes they were only half listening.
So Justin goes to find his name and he told me he couldn't find it well as soon as I went up there I realized he didn't know because his old last name is on there. I grabbed it really quick and slapped the sticker of his name high on his chest but he is very aware of his surroundings so of course he grabbed his shirt and said " mom this isn't my last name" and was pulling off the sticker.
I thought quickly and went into my purse for a marker and scribbled out the last name and told him he has to wear it and I took the last name off. He had a meltdown. Arms crossed, didn't want to answer to talk to the teacher or the principal there. I tried explaining by like I said above they must not understand foster situations because they weren't giving. I pulled Justin aside out in the hall away from everyone and explained that I am going to do everything in my power to make this better and get this fixed before kindergarten starts.

Sorry I forgot to describe the melt down part but lets just say not pretty and many people starring. Well my husband told me I should have never promised him that I would fix by September but I wanted him not to hurt or feel that pain that I can see he was feeling and was feeling really hard when he saw that last name.
I am now trying to follow through. I talked to my sister in law yesterday who is a lawyer. I asked her if I should write a letter explaining to the judge or am I going to get on his bad side. She said I should find out who the judges clerk is, and be really nice to her and ask her about the process because she says a lot of the time you can persuade the clerk and she handles the judges stuff to get things done. It is nice to have a lawyer in the family. So we will see what happens. I feel kind of bad doing that but like I said I promised him and I am following through and doing what ever I can possible for him. Cross your fingers hope this works.

I told all of you about in my last blog these cute kids I would love to adopt but there were four and if anyone knew of anyone who would adopt 4 to let them know. I am sorry to this person, but I got an e-mail asking me for the website because they couldn't find the children and by accident I deleted your e-mail and can't find it in my deleted. So I am writing it on my blog so hopefully it gets to you. I don't think I can post there picture from the website but I will post the website and you can see there picture on it. They are adorable 2 boys, 2 girl, ages 2-6. Adorable. Like I said if I knew someone in Michigan that wanted to adopt 2 I would adopt the other two and let the kids see each other all the time but unfortunately I don't. But I am truly sorry for deleting your e-mail. Here is the website
Hope that helps, if not e-mail me again and I promise that won't happen.
I haven't posted pictures in a while so to catch you all up on what has been going on.
Tim's Birthday
Justin's Tiger Game with Dad
Tim Caught a ball on TV and gave to Justin and they were both on TV it was cool and here is the call to prove it. They were even on the sports highlights
Justin's Graduation Day
Memorial Day weekend his first time in a sand box, his first time miniature golfing, first time tubing and did it with mom, first fish caught and fishing time with dad
Another baseball game but this was the one that is historic almost perfect game and was robbed I have a picture of the ref when he called safe when they were out that changed the game


  1. I will have the same issue with my two when school starts with their names. My SW has agreed to write the school a letter explaining where we are in the process and ask them to honor their new names.

    Also, even if the school administration won't use his new name his teacher should not have a problem with this. You might could set up a conference this summer and just talk to her about it. Explain to her that it means alot to Justin and she will probably not have a problem using his new last name. If she won't agree to use his new last name request that they not use a last name at all...just refer to him and have him write his first name only.

    Nate's kindergarten teacher did this for us. She called him only by his first name and then at the time they started learning how to write their last name she taught him our last name.

    I hope you can get this worked out for sweet Justin. This is so important to these kids. It is such an important part of closure for them.

    Love the pics. Justin looks so proud of his little fish. Adorable. He is really concentrating on his fishing pole in the pic of him on the dock with his daddy. :) Cool about the baseball game and catching the ball and being on tv. Such special memories!!

  2. We finalized the adoption of our daughter (via foster care) in April of this year.. She came to us June '09 as an adoptive placement.. When I went in August to sign her up for Kindergarten, I immediately went and spoke directly to the principal.. I explained that she was an adoptive placement and that she WOULD be adopted, it was just a matter of time.. I also explained that to her, her name was now Southern Darlin "NewLastName" and it would be detrimental to her mental health to force her to go by her OldLastName. They were receptive and said that while they do have to still put the legal name in there somewhere- they would put it on her file : Southern Darlin' OldLastName-NewLastName and then when we finalized the adoption they would just take a marker and black out the OldLastName.. With that said, we had not a single problem having anything ever come home with the OldLastName on it. Her teacher used the NewLastName in class and taught it to her to spell.. I would suggest going to straight to the principal.. Hopefully you can get it figured out! You're the mommy & you have to fight for it!

  3. To answer your question on my blog about my foster/adopt placements:

    We got Nate and Beth 20 months ago as a foster placement. Then Peyton (their bio brother) was born 4 months after we got them and DHR asked us to take him so the siblings could remain together. Then 1 year later (4 months ago) Britton (another bio sibling) was born and DHR again asked us to take him to keep him with his siblings.

    That is how we keep getting more and more kids. We started out to NEVER foster...only adopt one little girl between the ages of 6 -10. God had another plan and my hubby and I decided to put our heart on the line and do foster care until they matched us with a little girl.

    Thank goodness we did or we would have never been blessed with our four youngest children that we will be adopting at the end of this year.

    Their parents have abandoned them. The bio father has seen Peyton once at a day old and never seen Britton and has not seen Nate and Beth for 16 months. Bio mom has seen Peyton twice (for 1.5 hours total), Britton once (for 10 min.) and hasn't seen Nate and Beth since July 6th of last year (almost a year ago). They have had NO contact with anyone since these visits.

    TPR WILL, no doubt about it, be issued July 27th and we WILL, no doubt about it, sign intent to adopt papers 14 days after that (when the waiting period is up).

    We are beyond excited for all this to come to an end and even more excited that we get to start a new chapter in our family's life at the time of their adoption.

    We have 5 bio children and NEVER intended to have 9 but God has other plans for our family and since all we do is for God our Savior we are more than willing to follow God's plan for our lives.

  4. Thank you again for the support and thank you Kelly for your story. I appreciate everyone's support. Thank you so much.