Monday, November 30, 2009

Thankful!

Sorry but everything has been so busy. Between going to school in which I take my big 5 and 1/2 hour exam on Dec 5 (please wish me luck), and the holidays, shopping, work and all the places I have to take this little boy because DHS has things they request from you I haven't has time for anything. I try to get on but not long enough and then I hear him calling "Susie when are you going to play with me" and you know I have waited to so long for that moment that I can't pass it up and I run to have that time with him. He is doing well. Yesterday we hit a little bump in the road not such a good day. He had 3 time outs. I feel bad because I know it is because the holiday we have all our family and friends over and he did good all the other days but I think his parents were really on his brain yesterday. I felt bad putting him in time out but I know I have to stay on top of him or he will learn he can get away with stuff. I can't have him talking back and throwing things. My mother in law and father in law were over for the worst temper tantrum and they looked so uncomfortable they looked like they can run out of the room. He was thrashing and I had to hold his legs and arms and head and wait until he calmed down to start his 5 minute time out. Tim's mom didn't agree she thought I should start it right when I put him in time out but I explained to her that then he gets what he wants. He wants attention so if I am holding him down and calming him down he has my undivided attention and where is the punishment in that I start the time when I let him go and he was listening. I don't care if he is crying in time out just not trying to run away or have a temper he needs to calm down and think about why he is there. She said she doesn't believe in time out and she never did that but I think the child should know you are upset with them for there actions that hurts them more then hitting them. The hitting goes away the feeling that your parents are upset with you doesn't. At least that is what I explained to her. I try to explain that we pick our battles. She wanted to put him in time out for not listening to her when she told him to put on his socks. I told her that he takes off his socks all the time and he always runs warm and if he feels cold he can put on his socks. I personally didn't think that was something for her to fight with him with. If he is at her house that is fine but we were at my house. Some times gets frustrating when in laws want to tell you how to parent. If I asked her for advice that would be one thing but I didn't. It gets hard because we all need to be on the same page as not to confuse him.
I do what to say Thanksgiving was great and I am very thankful for this little boy. He is so special to us and I can't imagine our lives without him in it. We find out Jan 13 and I pray to god that God is on our side and that this boy doesn't go back because the judge happen to be in a bad mood that day. DHS says if it was up to them he would be ours and rights would be terminated. They say though it is up to the judge and judges are like gods and that you never know what they are going to do. I find it sad that judges never have to go to all the classes we had to, to be foster parents because then they would understand the system better and what is best for the child so they don't keep the child in the system for years and years and then the child is older and nobody wants the older child. It is sad. But I can't say enough how grateful I am to have him and share this time with him. He is just so great. I can't wait till he is ours and I can share that with all of you and show pics. He is so cute. :)

3 comments:

  1. I'm so happy for you. I figure that no news from you is good news and you are just enjoying this little boy. I'll keep you in my prayers, Jan 13th can't come soon enough! Lots of love!

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  2. When I was a nanny, I had a boy that would I have to hold for a while before I put him in time out due to fighting me and his brothers. And ya know, after a few weeks (I know it did take a while), he was my best little buddie after that and listened better, and didnt fight. You do what you think you need to do because you are the one that sees him all day and know what he needs. Glad you had a great Thanksgiving. Praying for a happy life for this little guy!

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  3. Sounds like things are going good for yall. I hope everything works out ok for yall on the 13Th.

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