Thursday, August 19, 2010

Crazy weekend

So I had got a voice mail last Thursday by Justin's social worker asking us to take 2 kids for a weekend and do a favor for DHS. Se left the message at 6pm and I didn't get it till 8 so when I got it all I can think about is those poor kids where are they now because I didn't get to my phone and DHS had no one to take these kids and I had to be there last resort because they know I only want to take in kids that are either terminated or they may be terminated with there birth parents because I get to attached. Well when I told my husband about it he said absolutely not unless there was a chance to adopt. I called on Friday morning to find out more and no they were not adoptable but they needed a home because they home they were in was already full and the kids shouldn't have been there but they had no where for them. It was a 3 year old and a one year old siblings.

I thought to myself well this would be a test whether Justin really wants siblings or not and it will show me if I can take on 3 kids. Usually people have one kids at a time to adjust to 3 but we were just going to go from none to one to 3.

So I did say yes and my husband didn't agree and said do what ever makes me happy. So we went up north with them since DHS said it would be ok. It was a little overwhelming at first because you don't know the kids or temperament and they are scared of you at the same time. They have moved from a total of 5 homes in the past at there young age which I think that is crazy how many chances are you going to give these kids mother. I felt bad for them.

Justin decided he doesn't want to be the youngest as he has said in the past he wants to be the oldest. He loved helping out. He would get me the diapers and whips for to change the little one. He would help the little one on the couch and play all the time with the 3 year old. He loved it.

So Monday came and the kids social worker called and said would we be willing to take the kids for 2 more weeks maybe 3 then it went to the most 4. Ok now they are playing me. I said I was willing to do a favor and I would hate to have these kids go to another home but it is not fare to me or my family. I told her you said you needed a favor I help up my end of the deal and now I have to feel guilty. I told her she made us believe it was only a weekend. She started to explain the place the kids came from she was hoping would be approved to take more kids but was denied she was at capacity. They also have a relative to the kids that was interested but she has to investigate. She then said the most 2 weeks you would keep them and she kept giving me the guilt trip. I called my husband crying and my mother in law asking for advise and like they said if there is no chance with these kids there is no use for our entire family to get attached because to tell you the truth we all were attached to those kids when they left. They were so cute and good kids. Justin kept crying begging me if we can keep them and they can be his brother and sister. I had to explain to him that I was sorry but we were only babysitting just like I said the first day.

He got sad and said but I will never see them or play with them again. I explained I knew and it was ok to be sad and cry because I was sad too. I called the social worker and told her no. It was hard I was crying and then I thought this is why I don't just foster because these kids were only with me a weekend and I was crying imagine a year or something and then giving them back. I was sad but I felt like it was the best move for our family. Everyone had to be on board. So then I got a call back that they decided to take the kids to the relatives and continue to investigate the relative and that made me feel so much better because then it is family and someone they know not just another stranger. So that was my crazy weekend. Hopefully we get a call on some kids for our family and Justin.

Speaking about Justin we found out the appeal court date is September 15 and the social worker said with her experience we should have an answer that day so pray that everything goes well and just is official terminated so we can get a court date. The social worker would like us to hold out on the adoption till adoption day in November but our family wants it as soon as possible to put all of this past us. As it is once we adopt him he would have been here a year. That to me is a long time seeing how parents were termed in January. The adoption worker says that it takes about 2 weeks to get a court date so that would be end of September beginning of October I pray that September 15 comes in a hurry.

2 comments:

  1. praying that all goes well with getting the court date. Your state seems to move faster than ours. We have had little j for two years and just got termination.

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  2. Well I hope things go well for your family and Little J. Justin was in care and this was his 3rd time so when they called me up they told me that he would most likly be terminated on because we were only taking a child if there was a chance for termination so we knew he was going to be termed on that was there goal the moment he stepped into our home. Parents termed in January and then the birth father appealed and September 15 would be almost 8 months which has felt agonizing. I just can't wait till it is over and it is official and no more worrying. In October it would be a year of having him. I will just be happy when it is offical. :)

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